That was not true, I had my own go@l.

盲流艺术家

"what does 盲流 really mean? It applies to a person who did not follow the life that someone else arranged for him. The arranged life may be desirable in this way and that, but a 盲流 opted to blaze his own path, to live according to his own mandate. For the person who was supposed to arrange your life, you were a 盲流. Because you were blind, and pursued no meaningful goal in life. That was not true, I had my own goal. We all tried hard to control our own lives, instead of being controlled by someone else."

Interview with Zhang Dali on Chinese contemporary art in the 1980s by Asia Art Archive
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=29NJkfl-VQ0